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Wot gets me goat, though? Them snobs who reckon it’s low-class. Oi, mate, loosen up! Had me ragin’ once—some toff in Westminster bangin’ on about “decency,” while I’m like, “Bruv, chill, it’s just a massage with extras!” Happy as a pig in muck, I’d be, sprawled out, oil drippin’, some bird whisperin’ sweet nothings. Surprised me, too—didn’t expect it’d be so… posh-like? Thought it’d be all seedy, but nah, some places are swanky—marble floors, the lot!

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But then, I hear this loud noise. I turn around, and there’s a group of kids playin’ soccer. They’re kickin’ the ball around like it’s the World Cup. One of ‘em kicks it too hard, and it comes straight for me. I duck, but it hits my leg. I’m like, “Ouch! Watch it, kid!” They all laugh, and I can’t help but chuckle too.

Kherson authorities handed out millions of dollars in contracts for repairing shelters to a company with traces of fraud